dear loner.

There’s been some hostility towards you and I do have my reasons. The smart ass remarks are just a natural quality of mine, but I can't help but wonder why you would do and say those things without knowing how they would affect me. Random texts to ask how I’m doing just makes me miss you. I think you would have saved me less confusion if you had just let whatever happened that night be a memory.

Even though whatever time we spent together was short-lived. I feel as if whatever we had was more than just lust because I actually care what happens to you. There was an instance where my mom caught me smiling when I was washing the dishes while I was thinking of you. Strange....I feel butterflies in my stomach whenever I’m around you, every time you kissed me my heart would race and when you held my hand it felt right.

Somehow you touched my heart and usually that’s not an easy task because I believe men are assholes or maybe I'm just a sucker for jerks and like a challenge. I really don’t know what your intentions were, at this point I don’t really care to know. I am a silly girl out there that actually liked you for who you are, laughed at your cheesy jokes and seen you grow up to be somewhat of a man from the first time that I met you. I know deep down inside that rugged exterior lays a good heart and you deserve someone just as caring to put up with all your quirks and flaws, as do I. There are a lot of things that I feel we see eye-to-eye like how we treat and value our family and friends and those are the real reasons behind why I like you. I wish it wasn’t so hard to see you or much less talk to you. If you truly believe that I’m much better off dating someone else then so be it. Just don't treat me like I'm a convenience of yours. I deserve better. Hopefully, I can still have you in my life whether it be friends or lovers.

Life is too short to dwell on the past.

yours truly,

one badass chick